Freedom

So, I have decided that I shall report to no one from now.

No one will care if I am late or early.

How much work I get done.

I decide on my own. Read an article, super inspired now!

50 Reasons to Start Your Own Business

1. Flexibility. Work your own hours.

2. More spare time.

3. Call the shots. 

4. Set your own deadlines. 

5. Sell how you want to sell. 

6. Create your own environment. 

7. Pursue your passion. 

8. Create something from scratch. 

9. Meet new people. 

10. Build a team. 

11. Create jobs. 

12. Help people. 

13. Become an expert. 

14. Invest in yourself. 

15. Make more money. 

16. Financial independence. 

17. Tax benefits. 

18. New challenges every day. 

19. Get exposed to new cultures. 

20. Discover new fields. 

21. Create an asset. 

22. Connect with your clients. 

23. Delegate boring tasks. 

24. You can stop working. 

25. The power to give. 

26. Get involved in the community. 

27. Improve your industry. 

28. Get a mentor. 

29. Become a mentor. 

30. Learn new skills. 

31. Attend new classes and seminars. 

32. Have a big office. 

33. Work from anywhere. 

34. Have the option for multiple ventures. 

35. Gain entrepreneurial experience. 

36. Get recognized. 

37. Get things done faster. 

38. Build a personal brand. 

39. Get more creative. 

40. Inspire others. 

41. Reduce your commute. 

42. Have more job stability. 

43. Find pride and fulfillment. 

44. Reach your dreams. 

45. Learn to embrace failure. 

46. Have a great story to tell. 

47. Leave something behind. 

48. Change the world. 

49. Resources are plentiful. 

50. There’s nothing stopping you. 

If you want to become an entrepreneur, there’s nothing really holding you back. Take the leap, and lead the company you’ve always wanted.

The Path Forward

I have decided not to be a victim.

I am a survivor!

Everyday, I will make a decision to make our tomorrow better.

Workplace bullying

I wrote in one of my post that I think I was in my dream job.

Close friends would have detected there is some reservations when I made that comment.

The company was great, good benefits, awesome pantry and a lot of fun. However, the person closest to me in that company was killing me. Yes, I had resigned.

It was in July 2013, when she (my boss, let's call her RS) took my deal and tried to close it and make it hers.

Of course, with Heaven's grace, it didn't happen as she wished. However, my heart turned cold. I felt like running away. 

Before that, she also transferred bad deals to me and made my win-rate looked low. She assured me that this is not going to affect my compensation. I was just a trash bin.

I didn't breathe a word about this, until the Big Boss visited us. He was an intuitive boss! He knew what was happening and made me report to him directly in Nov 2013. I thought " that was great! I don't have to quit anymore!"

She told the rest of the world another story why I had to be her peer now. Things was swept under the carpet and life goes on...

Of course there are episodes of RS still exploiting me, as if I am still reporting to her. She would make me work on the most difficult cases and she goes on leave. Every year, I would close the most important and complicated deal for her, and she claims the credit. Oh, not really. she gave credit to EVERYONE except me. She was hungry of attention.

So, Big Boss made clear of our duties and each of us will be in charge of a segment. She, however, keep crossing over the line. She would pretend to work very hard when bosses are around - well, this is call working smart.

She would make remarks in a very bitchy way, as if she is some Queen. And she does have the aura of evil Queen. She likes to wear Hermes and is very obsessed with them. No wonder she had to snatch my deal, she needs money to finance her desires.

She looked down on me. Her presence make me sick, she is pretentious and fake. 

I am just an ordinary mother. I have no high aspiration in the career. I just want to feed my family.

She made me look so bad.

Big Boss knew, he said I did a good job. And he knew she was a bully. But he is so far away.

One day, she did it again. I swallowed hard and sent her an email, with Big Boss on copy. And the war began. There is no turning back as you could imagine.

We stopped talking totally. She began giving evil vibes and cold stares. We were sitting next to each other, and one day I found my jacket on the floor. She has to either jump or step on it to cross. Being a Diva, she wouldn't jump.

Anyway, there was never teamwork in place. Only I helped her, it was a one way street.

I resigned in Dec 2014. Big Boss rang me many times. My answer remains to same.

I am tired.

I am just an ordinary mother.

I am no fight for this mid-age single woman who keep committing emotional terrorism on me.

I have enough of stress-related illness. 

I have done my part. It's time for me to go.

There was a lot of persuasion and Big Boss also flew in to bid goodbye. It was very nice of him.

To me, nothing is more important that family and health.

Today is 25th day of freedom, and I am still loving it.

To all the mummies out there, if you are stressed at work, remember your priority.

Life is too short to be unhappy.

Some people has miserable life and wants to make us join them. Identify them, and get them out of your life. 

I have realized, I am not born to be bullied. I am not a doormat. I am who I am, and I stand tall.

I have the power and the ability to step away from such toxic people. I can do it and she can't!

I have saved enough to quit without a job and I am glad I did! 

I didn't scrambled to her bullying and buy branded bags and watches. And I am what I am today!

LET IT GO!

Below are some useful resources: 

http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-with-Workplace-Bullying-and-Harassment

http://balancedbabe.com/how-to-deal-with-a-bully/

http://www.workplacebullying.org/2009/05/20/wow-bullying/

And this is my favourite : http://www.news.com.au/finance/work/the-eight-types-of-workplace-bitch-and-how-to-deal-with-them/story-e6frfm9r-1226600625232

What constitutes as “bullying”? 

An individual who actively seeks out another person to continually target with backhanded comments, derogatory statements, and defamatory material is a workplace bully. Often, they spend time talking to other colleagues behind the targets back to discredit them. Frequently, they attack the targets character, and purposefully exclude them from important meetings, emails, or office social functions. 

Why? 

A bully bullies because they are profoundly insecure, yet they compensate w narcissism and arrogance, so they do not seem insecure. They seem all Powerful. Yet, they are deeply jealous of their target. Many times it is because the target is a kind, nice, conscientious person who has deep relationships which threatens the bully because they are incapable of that. 

To my friends out there, remember, we have the power and control. Stand up!

Baby Gender Prediction Chart

How do you know if your baby is a boy or a girl?

Here's a chart for your reference.
So far, it had been very accurate for myself and friends!

My dream

Thinking about life again...
What do I want to achieve in life?

My maid can achieve her goal in 2 to 4 years, to build a house.

What about me?

How long do I have to work to have my dream house?

What should I do now to make the difference? Should I just quit and concentrate on a business?

Goals and birthday wishes

July is a month I feel warmth and happiness.

We have a lot of celebration and gatherings. It's my birthday as well as xhh, hubby and friends.
I enjoy being a cancerian and is a typical cancer. I like to do things at home and home is my shelter.

My birthday wish is simple :
Good Health for my family and friends

If I can have 3 wishes, what would that be?
1. Good health
2. Good brain
3. Good relationships

What are my goals?
1. Saving enough for our next house
2. Earning enough for BMW
3. Spending enough quality time with my family

What do I want to become?
1. A good mummy
2. A good wife
3. A good daughter
4. A good friend
5. A good person

What do I want to be seen as?
1. A good person

Updates

Dream job, I seem to be in dream job now. This job permits me to work from home, but boss doesn't like the idea. I hope she finds happiness and bliss soon. Life is too short to be working only.

Expenses wise
We are big spenders now. We spend on unnecessary things which I can't even point my finger at? I know the bills are 3-5 thousands a month? What did we spend on?

Lunch is expensive for me. My colleagues like to have lunch at restaurants which is ridiculously priced. If every lunch I spend $15, I would spend $450 a month. Can we have $3 food?

It's ok

We must be forward looking. Those things that had happened in the past - let it go. Only then we will have a brand new beginning.

When kids are sick, so long they get well, it's ok.
When job doesn't seem going right, so long we get paid, it's ok.
When we are wrong, so long we rectify it, it's ok.

My life

How time flies.. Suddenly thought of this blog after 2 and half years later.
I have a 2nd child, adorable and close to my heart.

I love her as much as I love xhh. Let's call her xbb.

Life has been good.
I have a chance to buy a good apartment near my parents-in-law
Had a new job in a good company.
Hired a good helper who is good at heart, although a little slow but she is kind.
Has a car
2 kids - thank heaven they are both healthy
Doting husband
Family in good health

I feel blessed. Thank you God and heaven.

Before I started writing these, I was feeling down- for no apparent reasons.
Not anymore.

Don't worry be happy.

Childcare Blues

How can I admit that xhh is not adapting well in the childcare?
To put him in childcare, I had fought with my in laws...

To date, he attended 9 days of child care
Day 1 - I was with him
Day 2 - I was with him
Day 3 - I was still with him
Day 4 - He cried a while, until I let him saw me outside, he started wailing
Day 5 - He cried non stop
Day 6 - He lost his voice, I heard he cried non stop, i fetch him at 6pm
Day 7 - same as day 6
Day 8 - He did not eat nor drink milk - I took half day leave and bring him home at 3pm, I found tat the teachers gave him milk mixed with strawberry flavour?! (not formula) I wonder why they did that. He did ate the cakes during tea break
Day 9 - He lost his voice, I brought him back at 4pm
Day 10 - He got a viral fever. 40°C.

He will not be attending childcare tmr. He is still having fever.. But now, his temperature is only 35.1°C, is it dangerous?

Childcare re-evaluation

1. I find that the teachers in this childcare in experienced
2. and there are also some politics going on between them
3. I do not feel that they are passionate about kids

Work re-evaluation

1. Shall I quit my job to be a SAHM?
2. or work part time?
3. or work from home?

Being a working mum is so hard.
I wonder how other mums do it.

Xhh is going to childcare

17th Jan will be the first day of school for my little darling.
I brought him for orientation and it seems like he is very at home with his new school.

There was a questionnaire on what do I hope to achieve?
1. Confident
2. Sociable
3. Happy
4. Explore and learn

I'll be with him for the first and second day, half day on the 3rd day.
Hopefully he sets in nicely.

My Timetable
6.00am Wake up
6.30am Wake Xhh up, get dressed up
6.50am Ready to go out
7.00am In the Car
7.05am At Childcare
7.10am On the way to work
~~
5.45pm Reach home, boil soup, cook rice
6.30pm Fetch Xhh home
7.00pm Xhh bath
7.30pm Dinner
9.30pm Xhh sleep
10.00pm Prepare uniform, bedsheet and water bottle in his bag

Maclaren XT

I am happy with this purchase.
$398 for a 2008 model Maclaren XT charcoal colour.

Xhh took a 4 hours long nap in it while hubby and I went shopping.
Much much much better than Quinny Zapp.

I love it! Should have bought it earlier!

Bliss

Feeling blissful right now...

Everything seems right at the present moment.
What can I ask for?
I am happy.
Happy with job, my life, my husband, my child..

I wish for happiness always..
Happy new year 2011!

Finding my dream job

I would like to have a job that

1. pays well
2. allows me to work from home
3. allows flexibility so that i can bring my son out

Any recommendation?

The day he broke my heart

I put my baby to nap.
Hurried to NTUC.
Got fresh veggies and meat.
And his favorite chicken cheese hotdog.

I pick up a half chicken, and wanted to make broth.
We gonna eat healthy!

3 hours of brewing, chicken soup with red dates was ready.
I fish out the chicken meat and bones.
I ate some. Tasteless.
I left them on the table, telling my husband he can eat if he wanted to.

He said:"Even ants are not coming to eat, I think this is bad stuff!"

That's how he broke my heart, my trust, my love.

I am not going to cook for him again!

How much do I spend per month?

Utilities $200
Car. $1000
Parents. $900
Food. $600
Housing. $1000(CPF)
Phone bill $100
Internet. $60

Simplicity

Life.
How do you live your life?
Simple does it?

Should I be contented with what I have now and stop dreaming?
Should I tolerate simple-mindedness and live happily ever after?

What do I want to acheive in life?

Fine weather today.
Cool and windy and it's a public holiday (Hari Raya).

I began to think about my future.
What do i want to achieve in life?

I've seen on TV, young women striking out on their own, being their own boss and making big money.
Some had websites or blogs..

What about online stock trading?
Is it risky after all?

How about setting up my own shop?
How much do I need?
What are the steps?

I wonder if I ever will execute my dream...
Just too lazy right now... :)

How bad can a 1st Birthday Party go wrong?

Over the weekend, I attended a relative's 1st birthday party.
It's quite disastrous.

Here's how.

What's good?

1. Beautiful and yummy cake from Pine Garden.
2. Everyone had more than enough to eat.
3. Packed food for every guests to bring home.
4. Close knitted family ties.

What's bad?

1. No formal invitation, resulting half the guest did not turn up (see above).
2. Bad quality balloons that kept bursting.
3. Screams.
4. Shouts.
5. Minimal decoration.
6. Homecooked food (I am not saying homecook food is bad, see Observations below).
7. Venue is extremely cramped.
8. Rose syrup drink?! Yucks!
9. No one had a lighter during cake cutting ceremony.

Conclusion:
It was the worst 1st party so far I had attended.
The 2nd worst is still awarded to the same relative.
Is that the reason why their friends, relatives and even siblings were too busy to attend this time?


Observations:

I am not saying homecooked food is a no no for party. A few dishes to show off your culinary skills will be awesome! However, I am very against the idea due to the following reasons.

1. Stress.
2. Sensitive to comments.
3. You realise your friends are dishonest - "Ya, the food is great!" while it sucks. Stop giving them stress.
4. Washing up.
5. Honestly, the food really sucks. Too dry, too hard, blunt and too spicy curry, too salty.

1st Birthday Party

My son's 1st birthday party was a great success.

What's good?

1. Nicely design invitation e-card from Smilebox.
2. Nice place, nice ambience at NSRCC.
3. Beautiful cake from CupcakeDivinity and Candles and Goodie bags from http://preciousbirthday.blogspot.sg.
4. Nice food from Neo Garden.
5. Great BBQ food from Neo Garden too.
6. Nice decorations.
7. Floating balloons.
8. Over 120 honourable guests.
9. My family are of great help.
10. Great get-together
11. Great friends.
12. Photo taking.
13. Laughter.
14. Enough seating.
15. Enough drinks.

What's not so good?

1. Not enough food! Because it's too yummy!
2. Birthday boy is cranky, he needed some sleep.
3. My boy had a bad haircut.
4. We were so busy that we forgot to display our son's electronic photo album done by Smilebox.
5. Mother-in-law is cranky too, she needed to feel important.
6. Colours of the balloons are abit too dull to my liking.

Conclusion:

1. It was a great party.
2. I am very happy with it.

Tips:

1. Book chalet 6 months in advance
2. Do up a party checklist
3. Assign jobs for your mother-in-law to make her feel important and keep her busy.