I wrote in one of my post that I think I was in my dream job.
Close friends would have detected there is some reservations when I made that comment.
The company was great, good benefits, awesome pantry and a lot of fun. However, the person closest to me in that company was killing me. Yes, I had resigned.
It was in July 2013, when she (my boss, let's call her RS) took my deal and tried to close it and make it hers.
Of course, with Heaven's grace, it didn't happen as she wished. However, my heart turned cold. I felt like running away.
Before that, she also transferred bad deals to me and made my win-rate looked low. She assured me that this is not going to affect my compensation. I was just a trash bin.
Before that, she also transferred bad deals to me and made my win-rate looked low. She assured me that this is not going to affect my compensation. I was just a trash bin.
I didn't breathe a word about this, until the Big Boss visited us. He was an intuitive boss! He knew what was happening and made me report to him directly in Nov 2013. I thought " that was great! I don't have to quit anymore!"
She told the rest of the world another story why I had to be her peer now. Things was swept under the carpet and life goes on...
Of course there are episodes of RS still exploiting me, as if I am still reporting to her. She would make me work on the most difficult cases and she goes on leave. Every year, I would close the most important and complicated deal for her, and she claims the credit. Oh, not really. she gave credit to EVERYONE except me. She was hungry of attention.
So, Big Boss made clear of our duties and each of us will be in charge of a segment. She, however, keep crossing over the line. She would pretend to work very hard when bosses are around - well, this is call working smart.
She would make remarks in a very bitchy way, as if she is some Queen. And she does have the aura of evil Queen. She likes to wear Hermes and is very obsessed with them. No wonder she had to snatch my deal, she needs money to finance her desires.
She looked down on me. Her presence make me sick, she is pretentious and fake.
I am just an ordinary mother. I have no high aspiration in the career. I just want to feed my family.
She made me look so bad.
Big Boss knew, he said I did a good job. And he knew she was a bully. But he is so far away.
One day, she did it again. I swallowed hard and sent her an email, with Big Boss on copy. And the war began. There is no turning back as you could imagine.
We stopped talking totally. She began giving evil vibes and cold stares. We were sitting next to each other, and one day I found my jacket on the floor. She has to either jump or step on it to cross. Being a Diva, she wouldn't jump.
Anyway, there was never teamwork in place. Only I helped her, it was a one way street.
I resigned in Dec 2014. Big Boss rang me many times. My answer remains to same.
I am tired.
I am just an ordinary mother.
I am no fight for this mid-age single woman who keep committing emotional terrorism on me.
I have enough of stress-related illness.
I have done my part. It's time for me to go.
There was a lot of persuasion and Big Boss also flew in to bid goodbye. It was very nice of him.
To me, nothing is more important that family and health.
Today is 25th day of freedom, and I am still loving it.
To all the mummies out there, if you are stressed at work, remember your priority.
Life is too short to be unhappy.
Some people has miserable life and wants to make us join them. Identify them, and get them out of your life.
I have realized, I am not born to be bullied. I am not a doormat. I am who I am, and I stand tall.
I have the power and the ability to step away from such toxic people. I can do it and she can't!
I have saved enough to quit without a job and I am glad I did!
I didn't scrambled to her bullying and buy branded bags and watches. And I am what I am today!
LET IT GO!
Below are some useful resources:
And this is my favourite : http://www.news.com.au/finance/work/the-eight-types-of-workplace-bitch-and-how-to-deal-with-them/story-e6frfm9r-1226600625232
What constitutes as “bullying”?
An individual who actively seeks out another person to continually target with backhanded comments, derogatory statements, and defamatory material is a workplace bully. Often, they spend time talking to other colleagues behind the targets back to discredit them. Frequently, they attack the targets character, and purposefully exclude them from important meetings, emails, or office social functions.
Why?
A bully bullies because they are profoundly insecure, yet they compensate w narcissism and arrogance, so they do not seem insecure. They seem all Powerful. Yet, they are deeply jealous of their target. Many times it is because the target is a kind, nice, conscientious person who has deep relationships which threatens the bully because they are incapable of that.
To my friends out there, remember, we have the power and control. Stand up!
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